And without Dan and Lynn Gibson, there would be no OGSA.

While the Gibson’s world has not been sent into a tailspin courtesy of the effects of breast cancer, they understand all too well the impact losing a loved one can have on a family. So I asked Lynn to write something on how they overcame tragedy and pieced together their lives.

This is her story ... in her words.

We moved to Owasso in 1986 when Jenny was in the third grade. She had played one year of softball in Tulsa and liked it so we signed her up to play in Owasso. During her years playing “rec” ball, we were like most parents, unwilling to get involved. We basically sat back and let things be as they may.

We couldn’t see that to exact change we had to get involved. 

But, as Jenny got older we realized that she was really serious about playing and wanted to be a better player.  With the level of instruction, facilities and coaches in Owasso we realized she couldn’t get what she wanted, and needed, by playing non-competitive softball. She was tired of shuffling back and forth from one team to another and wanted to play a higher level of ball. Dan found a 14U team, the Oklahoma Dynamites (out of Oologah). She made the team and played with them her freshman and sophomore years. 

This was the beginning of being competitive. We didn’t have a clue what being competitive, much less what a qualifier was all about, but we learned and supported her.   

Jenny also played on the high school team her freshman year. 

During her freshman season, the high school team played at Hidden Valley, where the men’s and coed teams also played.  The games would start at 3:30 p.m. or 4 p.m., but at 6 p.m., if the girls weren’t finished they had to stop anyway, it was time for the men to play. The high school team didn’t have the fields and facilities they do now, it took a Title IX lawsuit by one brave girl to make that happen.  

On the morning Aug. 5, 1993, at about 8 a.m., I talked to Jenny and told her to be careful that day driving. It was suppose to rain. 

The next phone call I received was from a highway patrolman advising me that my daughter had been in an accident. She had lost control of her car on the rain-slick street and a driver in a large van broadsided her small car. She had severe multiple injuries.  I called Dan, and someone from work drove me to the hospital.  When I arrived at the ER they told me she was critical. I couldn’t see her.

Our son was in Tennessee with his fiancé, and we called him. They left Tennessee around 1 p.m., and drove a 12-hour trip in less than nine to get there before she died.  

He didn’t make it. She died at 10:30 p.m. For 13 hours doctors and nurses tried to keep her alive but her injuries were too severe.   

Many of her classmates, teammates, friends and family came to the hospital. Even more came to her funeral.  

The void and emptiness she left us with would stay in our hearts. Only time helped ease the intense pain we felt those first days, weeks and even months after her passing. Now, after all these years, the missing of her will never go away, and the remembering of her life will stay with us forever.  

A few weeks after Jenny died, Dan and I began to wonder what we would do with the pain we were feeling. We knew how much she cared about softball and her friends. We also knew how much she worried about the programs for the girls on the recreational level all the way up to the high school team.   

We thought about it and decided to start a scholarship fund in her memory -- the Jennifer Gibson Memorial Scholarship Fund.  The idea was to give the graduating seniors on the high school team money to go to college on. We thought maybe we would be able to give scholarships for a few years and that would be it.  We gave the first scholarships to three girls Jenny had played with on the high school team. That was in 1994, and to date 71 girls have shared over $170,000.  

The first year, 1994, we held the tournament at the Rayola fields. Some of the girls who played in that tournament as 12U girls have since received scholarships from the fund.   The next year we had 29 teams sign up for the tournament. 

We have often said we don‘t know how much longer we can keep doing the tournaments.  Every year it gets harder to find new sponsors to help with the costs of the tournament and to help with cash donations to the fund.  Also, the competition between area associations to hold tournaments is fierce and getting enough teams is an issue too. 

In 2007, we opened the tournament up to 14U teams as well as the usual 12U teams.  That was a good decision as we had 23 teams sign up to play. We were rained out Friday night and Saturday morning but we were playing by noon, and raised $13,400 for the fund.

The one thing that keeps us going with the fund is, knowing that Jenny would be proud of us. I believe with all my heart that she is watching and encouraging us to keep going.  I also believe that through her death, her life has touched so many people. Her death has given me the compassion and knowledge that only a mother who has lost a child can feel. I can honestly tell another grieving mother, who is in so much agony and pain, that, I know how she feels, that it will get better with time, but the deep hurt will never go away.  Also, I can tell her that she will have to learn to live with it every day for the rest of her life.  

People told me that I would “get over it” someday.  No, you don’t get over it. You learn to live with it.  

After Jenny died, Dan and I started meeting with the new OGSA group to see how we could help.  We quickly learned that there was much to be done to bring the program up to the standards Jenny thought they should have been and what we hoped they could be.   

We started by helping get the concession stand built in 1996. Dan spent countless hours begging for material donations to build the building.  He found plumbers, electricians, carpenters, lumberyards, roofers, concrete and countless volunteers to give of their time and money to build the concession stand.  At 10 a.m., on the Friday of a tournament, we didn’t have electricity, water, or sewer hooked up to the stand. I stood outside, cried and prayed, “God if you want us to do this, then we need some help.” The plumbers, electricians, and others started coming. By 6 p.m., we had everything up and running.  

Again, Jenny was watching over us.

I felt like we had put so much work into it and no one else would volunteer to run it, so I took it over. That was my first position with OGS -- concession coordinator.  Most people called me the drill sergeant. I made sure everyone took care to follow the procedures and keep the place clean

When the OGSA treasurer resigned in 2001, and no one else would take the position, I took that job too.  An auto accident in December of 2002, and another in October 2004, has kept me from working like I once did at the concession stand. Even though I can’t work the three nights a week I used to, I still help keep the stand stocked, the equipment serviced and workers scheduled.  

Through the years I have pretty much helped in every capacity except, I have never been on the three-wheelers to drag a field. Who knows, there is a first time for everything. Dan and I have dug ditches for pipe for the scoreboards, raked fields, mowed fields, swept, cleaned and cried many tears over the facilities at the park. 

And still, I wonder why we keep doing it.   

Dan volunteered for years as a tournament director. He spent many hours drawing up tournaments and making sure he had as many teams as he could sign up. He has since resigned that position but still can’t completely quit helping with the needs of the girls and the park.

Two years ago I stood up and told the parents that if other people didn’t get involved and help then the OGSA would go back to the Future Owasso Rams and I didn’t think they would like it.  People volunteered and are helping in so many ways. 

I don’t know if I will ever be able to completely walk away from OGSA but I do hope to give up more and more duties to the wonderful volunteers.  Until then, I guess I’ll just be Big Momma and keep everyone in line!